Bad Cover Versions: R.E.M.: Pale Blue Eyes

Before they signed to a major label and went through one of modern music's most soul-crushingly depressing slides into utter mediocrity, R.E.M. were a truly great band. But even truly great bands make mistakes, as this murdering of the Velvet Underground classic shows, available on R.E.M.'s 'Dead Letter Office'. The Velvet's 'Pale Blue Eyes' is the highlight of their self-titled third album, which proved that, behind all the detached coolness and feedback, Lou Reed was simply an unbelievably talented songwriter. Over its gentle drone, Lou tells the tale of a man haunted by the one he loves, despite the fact that she is already married. It is painfully intense, with a beautiful tune, and ranks as one of the all time great love songs, as Lou reveals, beneath his arch coolness, a man brought to his knees. Before the stultifying blandness of 'Everybody Hurts', R.E.M. were a band that had the emotional depth and musical courage to attempt a tasteful cover of this song. Unfortunately, it all goes horribly wrong from the start. Despite being capable of showing such emotional range, Michael Stipe just sounds like he's doing a pub karaoke version of the song, robbing the song of its potent emotional impact. The rest of the band are no less guilty, trading in the original's haunted droning for upbeat, jangly folk. The whole sorry affair's most cringe-worthy moment comes when the band enter the chorus - any pretence of subtlety is lost as the drums come crashing in, along with sunny harmonies. This is particularly depressing coming from R.E.M., as drummer Bill Berry was known for his command of subtlety, keeping his sticks to his chest and playing what best served the music; not to mention the quiet magic that Stipe and Mike Mills could weave with their unusual harmonies. I would expect such ham fisted nonsense from many bands, but really guys, I had come to expect better of you. Still, it's not as embarrassing as any of their recent albums.